Geta

I'm dead jealous of The Sunshines, who have been away red squirrel watching. Can't wait to see the pictures. Now -

I know a secret. I know where you can see a Geta Stone.

'What is a Geta Stone?' you all ask. Sit round the fire with a cup of hot chocolate and I will tell you.

In the third century there were two Roman emperors, brothers named Caracalla and Geta. The idea was that they would rule together, but they fought like Kilkenny cats until finally Caracalla had Geta murdered. But it wasn't enough for him that Geta was dead. He had to be eliminated, as if he had never been. Caracalla (which feels lovely to type) set out to eliminate his brother's name from the empire. Every stone, every tablet, every inscription with Geta's name on it was defaced. But in outlying parts of the Empire the job wasn't done quite so thoroughly. There's one in Northumberland which was later used for rebuilding, and the name 'Geta' can just be seen with a few deep gouges across it. Nobody's bothered about Caracalla now, but historians get all excited about Geta Stones.

Now, from the little I know of Geta and Caracalla they were both pretty unpleasant characters, but bear with me. There's a pattern here, a familiar pattern.

You send the beautiful stepdaughter into the forest to be killed. Oh, rats, she's back. And they don't call the story 'The Beautiful Queen', they call it 'Snow White'.

You want to take over an island and a certain squirrel gets in your way, so you get him OUT of your way, thoroughly and forever. And look what happens.

A Roman official and a few priests tried to get rid of an annoying Jewish chap. Now we've only heard of Pontius Pilate and Herod because they come into the story of Jesus of Nazareth.

You can't keep a good squirrel down.